Celebration

Little man has been with us for a full year today!

We celebrated on Sunday, with cake and a gift.

The birthday boy enjoyed playing with the box, tearing up a napkin while I made his cake, and tasting some birthday cake.

It has been the fastest year of my life.

Rollo is such a chilled out little guy (as long as he's not getting dressed).

He's getting funny, and loves creeping up on his brother under the table.

He takes after mama in loving his food. If it doesn't appear fast enough, he shouts.

He has a big sister who adores him, and makes plans to bring him everywhere as soon as he's able to walk. To her, he is "Litot patot", and they have great chats every morning, as soon as he makes his first sound.

He's waiting to get his first library card, but has been told he needs to stop eating books first.

He has two teeth, and we get to admire them constantly while he shows off his beautiful grin.

He is the snuggliest, most loveable little dude, and we're all delighted to have him in our lives.

Happy birthday my darling!

Homeschool questions

I have learned to say "fine" to so many questions I really wanted to answer properly, that I couldn't find a coffee mug big enough to drown my sorrows into anymore.

So I will write instead.

So, how is the homeschooling going?
Thank you for asking.
It's life. Some days are good, some days not so good.
Every minute of every day is busy, and I literally don't have a minute, when I am not responsible for at least one child.
This is not a complaint, just a fact.
Yes, it is my choice and I am happy with it.
No, it doesn't mean I can't get tired sometimes. Don't we all?
Everyone has the right to say they are tired. I am not an exception. I don't need to be told that I have brought it on myself. Just give me coffee and let me say stuff!

But, no matter how tired I am, I love homeschooling. I am still madly excited about it at the end of every day.
I still read about it, listen to podcasts and look for new resources. I love seeing the learning happening in front of me, and that will always keep me going.

Is it difficult with the baby?
No. He is also part of the family, and is learning with the rest of us. (Also, he spends a lot of time boobing, in the sling)
Unsupportive adults, however, are a different story!

So, do they "just" do crafts?
We do a lot of crafts. The kids enjoy art, and doing plenty to strengthen their hands and improve on fine motor skills has been recommended by their OT.
We also read a lot. We work on life skills, maths, and every other subject. It doesn't always look like school, but learning is always happening.
We play board games for hours. We go out. We go to playcenters.
We laugh, chat, help each other, snuggle, play, clean, shop.
So it really is just life.
The kids are happy. They have nice friends, and spend time with them free of being bullied, because they don't fit a mold.

Do I think schools are bad?
No, of course not. I liked many aspects of school when I was young. Learning, mostly. The social aspect, not so much. My difficulties with human interaction are not new.
Homeschooling was a choice we had to make for our family. Simple as that.
It is NOT
A) comment on anyone else's life
B) ranking different systems
C) coffee (Unfortunately. If I could change my strange choices into coffee, I would be sorted for life!)

What will they do in the future?
Who knows? Based on current interests, child 1 will be a chef, and a part time Lego engineer, with a side of comic book writing. Child 2 will run away with the circus. Child 3 will sleep for Ireland, if it ever becomes an Olympic sport.
I will most likely become a granny when I grow up.
Ask me next week, and all this could have changed.
From educational point of view, we will continue to homeschool through secondary, because Mr Buttons wants us to. If Captain wants to go to school at some point, she is welcome to try it.
There are numerous ways to get into universities and colleges, with or without public school. There is also a chance they choose not to go that route. Only time will tell!

Why is it so messy in my house?
This is a hypothetical question I ask myself numerous times a day, as I clear the table for the 10th time.
I am going to claim it's a science project.
I can do that, right?

Did I forget a question you have? One that you get asked a lot?
Always happy to chat, especially about education!

This is what I've been doing

First feed

Baby man

Fore Abbey

Snow

Happy in her wrappy

Sisterly love

           We have kept homeschooling going through labour, snow storms and lack of sleep.

                                We're all doing well, and are keeping busy.

Trying to bring a laptop into town to blog with three kids is not really something that happens 

too often, but will try to get back into it.

Little man is seven weeks old tomorrow, and keeps getting bigger. I just packed away mopst of his 0-3 months clothes.

Blur

It’s been a blurry sort of a day.

Kids pretending to be ninjas in the morning, while catching imaginary Smurfs.

Going to the hospital and reading John Holt in the cold waiting room, while holding back tears.

Being shown how to use an insulin pen by a sympathetic nurse. Wondering how poking a vaguely flesh-coloured cushion is going to compare to injecting myself.

Meeting Hubby and Captain for a coffee.

Going to buy enough baby clothes to fill the hospital bag.

Going to a doctor’s appointment. Hearing the baby’s heartbeat. Finding out I’m now lighter I was at my booking appointment.

Listening to Captain tell me about the adventures she had with Daddy. There had been killer whales and a deep dark wood in the hardware store, I was told.

Watching her dance wildly to a busker playing guitar in the cold night, while someone was setting up a Christmas tree stall.

Video chatting to Mr Buttons, who had gotten a letter from Hogwarts.

Reading the instructions to the insulin pen, while making supper and finding pyjamas.

The smell of peppermint from the oil burner.

Magical stories in bed, of wolves and ballerinas and mischief.

And the constant ache of missing my mom, as it would have been her birthday today.

The door that Captain built

Our bathroom has a door!

I appreciate it on rainy nights, when I don't have to drag an old door and a sheet of insulation in front of the doorway after my shower. But on nice evenings I still leave it open and admire the courtyard.

Captain loved the process of building a door.

She asked the name of every tool, screw and nail and delighted in handing Daddy things he needed.

Mr. Buttons had different view and complained of boredom after mere seconds.

Myself and Captain used leftover wood to make a village of houses, shops and even a little pharmacy.

The shop was required to sell spaghetti, beans and apples -can you guess what are some of the littlest lady's favourite things at the moment?

Wood blocks make great houses

New door

Old door

University of Mom

Things I have learned in the past few days:

1) Trying to read several books at a time works better when you don't have children.

Since I started reading I have had a habit of starting several books at a time; leaving them open in various rooms and reading a snippet here and chapter there. This used to work fine up until baby brain hit me and I could only focus on producing milk and remembering my name most days.
I have started to read more again and instantly slipped back into my old habits. At the moment I'm reading I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou, some book about mindfulness and catching up with issues of Breastfeeding Matters. Oh, and Politics of Breastfeeding is hiding somewhere with a bookmark that is moving very slowly. (This is, as always, to save my blood pressure from rising too much)

2) Letting your children cuddle tiny puppies is nearly as dangerous as letting yourself cuddle tiny babies. Each carries the same risk of your family getting a new addition.

This one is self-explanatory.

3) Trying to expand your husband's taste in toddler clothing is pointless. Cool, printed jumpsuit just isn't a pink dress. Luckily, said toddler knows her own mind*

*This often results in crocs two sizes too big and, if I'm lucky, a top.**
**Somehow I manage to get clothes on her before venturing into the public eye. This involves flattery, negotiations and magic.

As always, I would love to hear from you. Get connected on Twitter and tell me your tips on training hubbies on toddler style matters, weaning children from wearing crocs and good reads for tired moms.

When life gives you lemons...

The last few mornings have been a revisit to the great breakfast wars.

Yesterday it was Captain sitting in Mr. Buttons' chair.

Daddy moved her mid-breakfast to avoid a meltdown, which resulted in her abandoning any idea of continuing to eat. She had breakfast later, crisis averted.

This morning chairs were right.

It was Captain's lemon that annoyed Mr. Buttons.

The lemon was brought up numerous times.

Then it was time for some crawling on the floor, which was copied by Captain.

Then the lemon was mentioned again.

While nothing necessary was getting done.

After not nearly enough sleep for Mama few nights in a row.

Oh, and being up an hour before anyone else, making four (different) breakfasts and two lunches, while putting a toddler on the potty, getting her ready while trying to source some clean(ish) clothes for myself and getting two people to wake up at the same time.

Then the lemon was mentioned again.

Then it flew across the kitchen towards the bin.

Hi, I'm an over-stretched autism mama with no support network.

So, when life gives you lemons, you let your toddler eat them.

But only when big brother isn't around.

Also, you have a mental health day with super-secret bubble mixture, silly hats and a baby bath full of water after school.

Silent Sunday

I bought something silly

I finally have it, the most expensive key I've ever bought.
After a morning of stress, too many phone calls for my liking and a meltdown at the discount fruits in the supermarket...

...I got THE call!
Then I cried some more. After that I called Hubby and walked to pick up the key.
Then there was more hassle and more phone calls. But eventually they had to believe that little old, cried out, babywearing hippy me had indeed just finished buying a house. They tossed me my beautiful key with a "Good luck with it!" and I hopped out.

My darling friend took one of those pictures I will treasure forever.
I am holding up the key looking stressed, relieved, happy, sad, triumphant, delighted and all grown up all at once, wearing my sleeping toddler in her legacy wrap. It is the perfect picture to capture what I did, how I did it and who it was all done for.

Hubby came back early, the whole family celebrated with some lunch and then we drove out to the house. The kids had a great time running through the house, enjoying the echo of dancing feet in an empty house and picking flowers. We also saw some snails, spiders and a lone ladybug. Turns out Captain can figure out how to open giant gates in a matter of minutes. Also, she loves exploring in long grass and is fearless when it comes to bugs, climbing (everywhere) and is fond of turf.
Mr. Buttons took great pictures and videos, fell into nettles and climbed over the gate numerous times.

I can't wait to watch the house turn into our home.

Happiness is...

...spring cleaning the routine!

Hugs are the best medicine

After all the stress building up over the last while, I had a panic attack yesterday.

I used to get them quite frequently when I was younger, but have only had one or two since I stopped drinking nearly six years ago. That's why yesterday scared me.

Myself, Hubby and Captain were meeting a friend for a coffee, when I started finding it hard to catch my breath. My heart started racing and no amount of yoga breathing was working to settle me. I felt myself slip further and further away from the table. My whole body felt like I wasn't fully in it and trapped inside at the same time. Tears filled my eyes and I finally managed to tell Hubby I needed to go.

He got a big pile of treats, lit a fire and settled me on the sofa as soon as Captain was asleep. It's safe to say the movie never got watched, because I was in exhausted sleep within minutes of my head hitting the sofa.

This morning I'm feeling better. Not perfect, but ok. And that's fine.

Captain is up where she belongs, having a lovely wrap nap. Have you ever tried to be completely miserable with a toddler wrapped to you? Try it, I dare you! It is as impossible as catching a toddler before your first cup of coffee...

Fabulous Friday

An Irish woman, an English woman and a Finnish woman walk into a café...

Sorry, I've got no jokes. That was the highlight of my day today.
I met two of my favourite mamas in the world and got to chat about cloth nappies, boobs, osteopaths, wraps and plot a breastfeeding families' picnic. Books were mentioned too, but only briefly.

The kids played together and everyone was happy.

Then myself and the kids went to an indoor play area and had lots of fun. By the time we were leaving, poor little Captain was saying "Wheee, mama, whee!", while barely able to keep her eyes open. Mr. Buttons was sweating and drinking buckets of water. The smaller of the two was asleep within minutes of leaving the place, the bigger spent most of the walk home chatting to his newly found imaginary friends.

I've never seen the two of them happier to get back home. We got straight into our jammies, the kids had dinner and then we just chilled out with books for Captain and some telly time for big bro.

It appears my plan has worked. Both big and little are asleep, while I have managed to stay awake.
Now, to last until take away and some programs without talking animals or fast snails... (Graham Norton, don't let me down!)

Enjoy the start of your weekend!

Holiday at home

We've been out.
Walking, running, swinging, falling off things, climbing, blowing bubbles.
We've come in to eat and sleep. Naps happen in the wrap, as we walk.
(And one daily coffee break for mama. This is non-negotiable)
We're enjoying every ray of sunshine, while the school holidays are giving me time with my two buddies.
Today I managed to have an ice cream break with Mr. Buttons while Captain snoozed.
This made me very happy.

Also, made breastmilk lotion for the first time the other day and it's the stuff of legends!
Recipe can be found here. I'm using it on both myself and Captain and it's working wonders on our skin.

So I have no major news, just small big things. The kids are asleep, Hubby is home and I can hear a cup of coffee calling my name sweetly from the kitchen...

Hope you've had sunshine too!

Silent Sunday

The giant chocolate egg day

The Captain will only get chocolate flavoured breastmilk tomorrow.

Who am I fooling; she's been getting that for over a week now...

I take The Season of the Bunny seriously and practise for the final Sunday with passion,

eating any egg that doesn't roll away fast enough.

The total so far this year is five, I think. No shame.

I don't want any competition in the house, so Captain hasn't had any added sugar yet.

Because we are going to Nana's Easter party tomorrow, I got my little lady some plastic eggs and tiny chicks, so that she will have something special while the cousins are eating their treats.

I couldn't wait until the big day, so she has had hours of fun with her new little pals.

The delight in her face when she finds a chick is only equalled in cuteness by that extreme focus, when she tries to put them back in and close the egg.

Best three euro I've spent in years!

Now I will go and decorate my ridiculously chocolatey cake for tomorrow.

Happy Egg Day, Easter, Celebration of Spring!

Wild child

We've taken full advantage of the last few lovely days.

It's been a blast; with hours in the park, backyard and any other available piece of grass.

Drawing outdoors

 Having a rest mid-walk

Adventures

Short-lived tennis career

Having a pretend sleep after all the fresh air

What does your spring look like?

Girls just wanna have fun (and perhaps some cake)

We were in no hurry to get dressed this morning, so we did some chalk art after breakfast.

I am still finding blue and pink dust everywhere. I did clean up after this, but it didn't help. Turns out chalk dust is like blocks, creeping under things to hide and plot revenge. Tomorrow more will join its' force and I won't sleep easy for the next few weeks...

After a walk into town she was ready for ups and some take away milk.

We had a dinner guest for our girls' dinner in today.

We made an epic spaghetti bolognaise (with a sponge for dessert for the big people)

The we ate, chatted and had a lovely afternoon, which stretched until the evening.

Then Captain said "Peitto!" and went to get our snuggle blanket from behind the sofa.

She likes her little routine, no matter how good the company.

Now I'll go and try to eat some more and enjoy the peace until Captain puts me to sleep again.

Good night!

When the cat's away...

Hubby has gone to Amsterdam with his brothers for the weekend and Mr. Buttons is with Bio-mom.

Myself and The Captain are having a girls' weekend.

We went to a playgroup in the morning, followed by lunch in town.

Then we stocked up on some treats before heading back home.

Art materials are for my little friend, chocolate is for mama only, to be used medicinally.

I believe the correct dose is one whole bar taken with a cup of coffee and a marathon of Good Wife on Netflix.

Playdough annoyed Captain, because it was inside the little tubs she wanted to use as teacups.

The brush provided great entertainment and I got to hold the dustpan in place.

Then she had another go of the dough, got annoyed and took a bite out of the sponge that came with the cleaning set. I can't blame her, as my feelings towards cleaning equipment are similar.

Seeing as it was shower night, I put the paint out.

She had great time painting both the paper and herself, without being too upset when it was time to finish and hop into the shower.

Success!

When people ask you...

"What is it that you do all day?"

"Do you not get bored?"

"How does it get you that long to get into town?"

"Does your husband not mind if the house isn't clean?"

This. No. This is why. Ha ha ha.

Building project

"I see another tree! Bump!"

Stopping to check that her shoes are still there

Spring

Stones make a brilliant sound

Some more flowers (or "sniff, sniff", as they are scientifically known as...)

Shadows provided entertainment every few metres

They clap and dance when you do, you know...

We made some dinner

And ate some too!

Captain's baby joins her at the table too. Her baby acts very similarly to Captain herself, by needing to be picked up several times through the meal, hugged, calmed and nursed.

She does this with great gentleness and patience, but doesn't appear to follow BLW with her baba, which we must have a chat about...

In addition to this we

had an imaginary tea party (mama had some real cake too)

did the food shopping and carried it home (although Captain boobed and slept through this part)

sang songs

read a few books

watched Rio

did some dancing

helped Mr. Buttons with his homework

got the fire going

hung the washing outside to celebrate the sunshine (my inserts thank me!)

fed an uncle (I made the food, Captain fed it to him)

Now we are tired, but happy.

She is sensible and asleep.

I need coffee.

Mothers' Day

All the goodies

I finally made it to the conference!

I was trying to compose my thoughts earlier in a mind map, but it was hopeless. I'm still floating around after our lovely time inside the bubble.

It was everything I hoped for and so much more.

The love, slings, kids, the bigger kids running around in their jammies, the stalls, the beautiful families; THE ATMOSPHERE!

My big spend

I got myself some presents from the book stall.

Myself and Captain have already read the gorgeous Milky Moments twice. The first read especially was read with a strangely thick, cracking voice. I blame the cold, of course...

I love that we now have a book that suits our way of life to snuggle up to.

The Captain loves looking for the Teddy.

It truly has something for everyone.

After bedtime I started The Politics of Breastfeeding, and will be taking up blood pressure medication tomorrow.

The Breastfeeding answer book was the most practical purchase, but will have a pride of place in my book case nonetheless.

For months beforehand, I was extremely excited about going to listen to Dr. Nils Bergman's talks. I managed to stay through 'A Neurobehavioural Approach to Breastfeeding Including Premature Infants', The Captain had enough after a few minutes of '...Skin to Skin', so we went to the playroom and had fun and chats instead. (And saw the most fabulous dad rocking a pink crown gifted by his child. He was still wearing it hours later and was definitely one of my favourite people spotting targets.)

After coffee break I found someone I know and was told the next talk was about working and breastfeeding. I thought the information would be useful, so I went in. Turns out I went into the wrong room and there was another talk on at the same time. This one was about the LLL philosophy and was titled 'Everything old is new again'. I stayed and listened, laughed and cried, played a hugging game with the Captain and felt happy, strong and empowered. Listening to the amazing, wise Mary Bird was one of the biggest highlights of my first conference experience.

The gala dinner was lovely, like sitting around with a big, funny family.
Seeing all the babies and toddler in slings, on laps, highchairs, sleeping on chairs pulled together.
Captain boobed and slept through it, waking up to applause at the end and getting upset.
I missed Marian Tompson's address, but I can't say I'm too upset. I was snuggling my little lady in a beautiful lobby, multitasking to the max. I also got to see a mama tandem wrap a toddler and a baby for the first time in real life, so how could I have regrets?

The journey home was too tough on my little pal, who isn't a fan of the car, so I decided not to go back for Sunday's sessions. Funnily enough, one of the things that interested me the most about today would have been the Breastfeeding while pregnant workshop, but on Saturday I got the chance to talk to a mama who had fed her toddler through pregnancy and was currently tandem nursing, so that covered that nicely. And Captain could teach BLW workshops, so missing that didn't upset me either.

I came home to cards, chocolate, two men who had missed me and a Hubby who had had time to think. I now have a partner who wants to understand the importance of nursing a toddler. I have gotten the only Mother's day gift I ever wanted!

Thank you for the fabulous weekend, I'll be back next year with the whole family!
Happy Mothering!