Milky moments

My little girl is two years and three days old.

She got a trike for her birthday and was up on it as soon as Hubby had it put together.
She fell off and got straight back up again.
She wants to cuddle all the snails and cats, and has made friends with a foal down the road.
We spend a lot of time these days not wearing our shoes and hang out in the garden.

We made it to WHO minimum recommendation of two years of breastfeeding and are now heading into the "beyond" part.

She is brave.
And independent.
Mostly fearless.
Funny.
Strong-willed.
Unique.

I'm happy to have our little moments of milk and books after cycling.
Or be the harbour of a sling nap after her first time in the bumper cars.
There are no pictures of the special day, but I will carry the memory in my heart forever.

I have never been more proud of anything I've achieved and can't wait to see what comes next on our adventure.

Night out

I had my first evening (well, two hours) out without Captain. Who managed to lure me out, I hear you ask? Was it Hubby, with all his talk of needing time away from the kids? Was it old pals?

No. It was Mr. Buttons.
Yesterday, out of the blue, he asked me to go and listen to his school's choir. Me, specifically. Even saying Hubby would need to stay and mind Captain. He told me they sang a song that made him feel calm.

I felt honoured to be the chosen one, so I arranged Captain's oddfather to come over and babysit (he's the only one I would've trusted) and asked nana to give us a lift there to shorten the time a bit.

It was strange to be out in the evening without a sling, holding a -wait for it... a HANDBAG! This is the first time in two years such a thing has been seen on my arm. My backpack is now sulking in a corner, we'll have to sort things out tomorrow. I had a fabulous time, leaky eyes as the children sang and felt like I had shared something special with Mr. Buttons.

Mr. Buttons enjoyed some songs, "hated" one and used his program as a fan lots, which was great entertainment.

Captain had stuffed herself with peanut butter-pear porridge, made a video of saying "No!" in varying firmness of tone to everything Netflix has to offer (except Sponge Bob) and practised wrapping her oddfather around her little finger.

All in all, great night was had by all.

Happiness is...

...roaming around town with the kids.

Mr. Buttons has been off from school and I'm delighted to spend time with my two buddies.
Today we went to the park and spend ages just playing and climbing. He taught Captain how to go down the slide on her belly. This had us in stitches laughing, because in her attempt to slow down Captain ended up nearly crawling down like a little snail. (If snails were extremely cute and wore summer dresses)

I was also extra proud of my bigger pal for two reasons today. Both are related to social aspect.
In the park he found a new friend. He and the boy tried all the different things in the park, and Mr. Buttons really pushed his own comfort levels by climbing things that scared him a little. Instead of panicking, he explained to the boy that he was feeling a bit worried about climbing up ropes with two people on them at the same time. He got up and the fun continued. The boy got frustrated when Captain messed up a game they were playing, and sighed: "I hate her!" Mr. Buttons looked at him rather sternly and said: "You can't hate her. She's my sister." He wasn't angry, he wasn't scared to express his feelings and he solved the situation very well. Then they continued playing.

Eventually we went to get lunch. As we left the restaurant, Mr. Buttons spotted the boy and they were cheerfully waving at each other. He even knew the boys name. (Sometimes little things like introductions are completely skipped) We then went to get him some summer clothes, which he picked himself. He even went and tried them on in the fitting room. This was his first time doing any of this and I'm happy I encouraged him to do it. He was quite pleased with himself for being a big man, especially when I later told Hubby about our adventures.

I was also delighted after skyping my dad and stepmom today.
Captain woke up from her nap during the call and climbed up for milk.
My dad asked me, how long I was planning to nurse her. I replied that we were both happy, with no plans to stop. He then enquired how long kids nursed for. I started saying, that it depended on the child, when my stepmom piped up from the background "Until five anyway!"
My dad just said "Okay" and we continued our chat.
So, for breastfeeding mothers, happiness is also supportive grandparents!

Silent Sunday

Captain and mama go shopping

I went clothes shopping for the first time in a long time the other day.
It wasn't for fun, but for Mr. Buttons' communion. Seemingly their God would disapprove of my banana-stained maxi skirt and equally cheerful black, shapeless top. Go figure...

I, of course, brought Captain with me.
I was very clever and prepared by taking potential clothes options with me in two sizes, knowing I'd only have one chance to attack the fitting rooms. (I have tantrums if contained in little cubicles with clothes for very long. Toddler would have been fine.)
I asked to use the actual changing room, rather than the curtained cubicles. No escaping toddlers here, I thought. And then I forgot to turn the handle to lock the door. The Captain waited until I was standing there in my underwear, nursing bra flaps open; then proceeded to open the door with great flourish.
Closed and locked the door.
Tried on outfit one.
Heard a weird beeping noise.
Tried on outfit two.
Heard "Manager to changing rooms!" over the loudspeaker.
Realised toddler had pulled emergency chord.
Tried on last outfit, opened door, apologised.
Bought outfit that somehow miraculously fitted and was able to nurse in.

And I already had shoes to match.

Where else would you get entertainment like this for 21 euro?

Nips and picnics

Yesterday I cried before breakfast.
Today I made it until noon.

I had a lovely morning with my crazy little pal. I was meant to be drinking coffee, but ended up colouring and then assisting Captain in a completely bonkers jumping dance, complete with a very dramatic swoon all the way to the floor after each set of bounces. I found this hilarious, and she knew it.

We also did the most un-subtle NIP to date. She started off laying on my lap, but slowly squirmed her way down to the floor. In the end she was doing a little jig, while still latched on. If this wasn't enough, the server came over to ask if a juice box belonged to us. "No thanks, it's not mine", said I, politely. "It's mine!", said the Captain loudly, while still miraculously boobing away. This send me into a fit of giggles. The people who say mamas should cover up while nursing obviously haven't encountered The Captain... Dancing, chatting and devising a juice-box scam while having milk, that's my girl!

Then my friend came in. Another one joined in after a while. We chatted. Unsurprisingly, friend 1 had more to say about my parenting. At this point Captain was running around, making a game of going out of the children's area. I kept getting up and getting her. We were fine. Then came the "Oooooh, she's being naughty today!" To which I replied; "No, she's full of beans, running off steam before naptime and doing no harm!"

This little cloud of negativity upset me just enough for me to open up to the friend who came in later, after F1 left. I told her about how stressed out I've been and how lost I feel with the house business hanging over me constantly. I had a little cry, right there in public. Then I picked myself up again, Captain gave me sleepy wrap snuggle therapy and we had a picnic in the park when she woke up.

Another good day, I learned a lot.

1) A "dance-dance" makes everything better.
2) Talk more to the people who want to organise play dates with you even after you cry at them.
3) Have a picnic whenever you think of it, because two minutes later there could be hailstones.

Terrible teeth in her terrible jaws

The Captain is growing her fangs and has been in quite a bit of pain with them the past few days.

She has been pretty much perma-latched at night, rolling off to snuggle Daddy, only to cry out in pain and get back to Mama and the all-curing boob again. I'm glad I can offer her some comfort.

Daytime happiness is shadowed by horrible teething poos. And when you cloth diaper, you remember exactly how many of them the poor little darling has to deal with. We deal with this by nappy free time and extra playtime in the shower. That, and breastmilk lotion. That stuff is better than magic.

Hubby came to today's sling meet with us, to keep Captain entertained in the play area. But sometimes even slides and football with Daddy don't cut it. Especially if mama is wrapping demo babies and trying slings without you. So Captain came to find me and told me she wanted milk.

Sometimes you wrap your toddler and continue doing what you're doing.

Sometimes they just need you to sit down and hold them, without any rush or care about anyone else's needs. Today Captain needed me more than anyone.

So I sat, nursed and held her until the pain eased and her little limbs relaxed in my arms.

Those are the moments full of contentment.

Happy St. Patricks Day!

Dressing up, with attitude

She saw me wearing the hat and wanted it

I got this on my wedding day and wore it to the afters,

now I have my very own little Irish person to wear it.

How the time flies!

She kept it on for ages, to my surprise

Play dough shapes need lunch too

Climbing before the parade

Skateboard to follow soon...

We had fun, enjoyed the parade and met up with some friends.

When it all got a bit too tiring (read; when the Minion characters went away) the wrap and milkies were there to save the day.

I have learned that parades are better with a small friend and lack of hail.

Hope you had a great St. Patrick's Day!

Girls just wanna have fun (and perhaps some cake)

We were in no hurry to get dressed this morning, so we did some chalk art after breakfast.

I am still finding blue and pink dust everywhere. I did clean up after this, but it didn't help. Turns out chalk dust is like blocks, creeping under things to hide and plot revenge. Tomorrow more will join its' force and I won't sleep easy for the next few weeks...

After a walk into town she was ready for ups and some take away milk.

We had a dinner guest for our girls' dinner in today.

We made an epic spaghetti bolognaise (with a sponge for dessert for the big people)

The we ate, chatted and had a lovely afternoon, which stretched until the evening.

Then Captain said "Peitto!" and went to get our snuggle blanket from behind the sofa.

She likes her little routine, no matter how good the company.

Now I'll go and try to eat some more and enjoy the peace until Captain puts me to sleep again.

Good night!

When people ask you...

"What is it that you do all day?"

"Do you not get bored?"

"How does it get you that long to get into town?"

"Does your husband not mind if the house isn't clean?"

This. No. This is why. Ha ha ha.

Building project

"I see another tree! Bump!"

Stopping to check that her shoes are still there

Spring

Stones make a brilliant sound

Some more flowers (or "sniff, sniff", as they are scientifically known as...)

Shadows provided entertainment every few metres

They clap and dance when you do, you know...

We made some dinner

And ate some too!

Captain's baby joins her at the table too. Her baby acts very similarly to Captain herself, by needing to be picked up several times through the meal, hugged, calmed and nursed.

She does this with great gentleness and patience, but doesn't appear to follow BLW with her baba, which we must have a chat about...

In addition to this we

had an imaginary tea party (mama had some real cake too)

did the food shopping and carried it home (although Captain boobed and slept through this part)

sang songs

read a few books

watched Rio

did some dancing

helped Mr. Buttons with his homework

got the fire going

hung the washing outside to celebrate the sunshine (my inserts thank me!)

fed an uncle (I made the food, Captain fed it to him)

Now we are tired, but happy.

She is sensible and asleep.

I need coffee.

Mothers' Day

All the goodies

I finally made it to the conference!

I was trying to compose my thoughts earlier in a mind map, but it was hopeless. I'm still floating around after our lovely time inside the bubble.

It was everything I hoped for and so much more.

The love, slings, kids, the bigger kids running around in their jammies, the stalls, the beautiful families; THE ATMOSPHERE!

My big spend

I got myself some presents from the book stall.

Myself and Captain have already read the gorgeous Milky Moments twice. The first read especially was read with a strangely thick, cracking voice. I blame the cold, of course...

I love that we now have a book that suits our way of life to snuggle up to.

The Captain loves looking for the Teddy.

It truly has something for everyone.

After bedtime I started The Politics of Breastfeeding, and will be taking up blood pressure medication tomorrow.

The Breastfeeding answer book was the most practical purchase, but will have a pride of place in my book case nonetheless.

For months beforehand, I was extremely excited about going to listen to Dr. Nils Bergman's talks. I managed to stay through 'A Neurobehavioural Approach to Breastfeeding Including Premature Infants', The Captain had enough after a few minutes of '...Skin to Skin', so we went to the playroom and had fun and chats instead. (And saw the most fabulous dad rocking a pink crown gifted by his child. He was still wearing it hours later and was definitely one of my favourite people spotting targets.)

After coffee break I found someone I know and was told the next talk was about working and breastfeeding. I thought the information would be useful, so I went in. Turns out I went into the wrong room and there was another talk on at the same time. This one was about the LLL philosophy and was titled 'Everything old is new again'. I stayed and listened, laughed and cried, played a hugging game with the Captain and felt happy, strong and empowered. Listening to the amazing, wise Mary Bird was one of the biggest highlights of my first conference experience.

The gala dinner was lovely, like sitting around with a big, funny family.
Seeing all the babies and toddler in slings, on laps, highchairs, sleeping on chairs pulled together.
Captain boobed and slept through it, waking up to applause at the end and getting upset.
I missed Marian Tompson's address, but I can't say I'm too upset. I was snuggling my little lady in a beautiful lobby, multitasking to the max. I also got to see a mama tandem wrap a toddler and a baby for the first time in real life, so how could I have regrets?

The journey home was too tough on my little pal, who isn't a fan of the car, so I decided not to go back for Sunday's sessions. Funnily enough, one of the things that interested me the most about today would have been the Breastfeeding while pregnant workshop, but on Saturday I got the chance to talk to a mama who had fed her toddler through pregnancy and was currently tandem nursing, so that covered that nicely. And Captain could teach BLW workshops, so missing that didn't upset me either.

I came home to cards, chocolate, two men who had missed me and a Hubby who had had time to think. I now have a partner who wants to understand the importance of nursing a toddler. I have gotten the only Mother's day gift I ever wanted!

Thank you for the fabulous weekend, I'll be back next year with the whole family!
Happy Mothering!

Womanly art...

There is an art gallery in town that myself and the Captain visit quite often.
Because of all the house business, a while had gone by between our art dates. So today we were walking by and decided to call in to see if our old favorites were still there. Anything with animals is a big hit with the littlest art critic, sculptures of old men are met with a growl.

The Captain still loved it, but there was one big difference.
She has learned to say "boob" since the last visit. To test her new communication skill, she pointed at every painting, sketch and sculpture with breasts and (with great delight) exclaimed: "BOOB!" This was followed by her looking at me smiling and waiting for me to confirm that this is what they indeed were. Myself and Hubby found this extremely amusing.

So, next time you visit an art gallery, play "Spot the breastfed toddler" by following delighted shouts of "Boob!" and please come and tell me how you got on!

How many 'L's in happiness?

Today has been a good day.

I booked tickets for the LLL conference for myself and a friend. It's the first one for both of us and I'm already beyond excited. Last year I missed it, because I hadn't been to any meetings and thought you had to be a member to go. This year I just had to book early, it being so highly recommended by everyone and a big 50th anniversary year at that!

I'm not able to decide what I'm most looking forward to, but highlights for me are hearing Marian Tompson, the founding mother of LLL speak, attending Dr. Nils Bergman's talk about kangaroo care and hopefully squeezing in the 'Breastfeeding while pregnant' workshop. One of the biggest things for me is the lovely atmosphere that I know the weekend will have. It's going to be fantastic being surrounded by likeminded families, spending time with friends and meeting new ones.

Also, the sling spotting will be epic...

Roll on March!
Who else is going, and what are you most looking forward to?

SSS

Just the wraps, from top to bottom:

Opitai mei tai (Pollora Hedgehogs)

Yaro Ivy Black&White (4)

Danu Sky Songs Midnight (5)

Natibaby Kraken Carbo (5)

Pollora Jolly Van (6)

Natibaby Oxytocin Neptune (7)

Happy New Year

The last BLW meal of the year.

Coconut rice and bean chilli in rosti form.

It has been a fantastic year of good food, lots of firsts, fun and friends.
This new year's eve I'll be skipping resolutions and focusing on just enjoying life just like I did for the whole year.

Time to stick on some party food, have fun with friends and enjoy snuggles with The Captain, when she wakes up to nurse again.

Happy New Year, everyone!

Bosom buddies

Our internet connection problem has been fixed, hooray!
In the meantime I've been baking a lot, cleaning more than usual and reading nearly enough.

Last week we had our monthly sling meet up and I brought Hubby to run after The Captain so I could focus on wraps and chats. This was one of my smarter decisions in a while.

The Captain ran around with daddy for a few hours and both of them had lots of fun. Then she got tired and wanted milky snuggles. I sat down on the sofa beside a mama I know from breastfeeding support groups, but haven't really chatted to one-to-one. As we fed our little and slightly-less-little ladies, we started talking. It started off with the usual baby and baking chit-chat, but before I knew it we were talking about our families, pasts and hopes for the future.

The topic of breast pads getting lost into clothing came up. I sympathised and said mine roll into a sausage and travel into the bottom of my bra. This brought on an understanding;"Ah, still leaking. She is a boob monster, I suppose. That'll probably be me in a while too." No judgement to the fact that my toddler feeds on demand, no uncomfortable silence at my confession that I had to hand express the last time I brought Captain to play and she was too busy for milk for longer than usual. The last time I sat down to nurse in the same venue, beside another mother, I got the "Oh, on the boob. You won't be going to feed her on her lunch breaks when she goes to school, will you?" I mentioned this, and all I got this time was a comment on how sad it is, that people feel the need to comment on the duration of anyone's nursing relationship.

This mom is definitely amongst my breastfeeding heroes.
She is a great support to every mom around her, leading by a lovely, gentle example.
So when the breastfeeding support groups come up with some sort of Nursing Genie Awards, I'll be the first one nominating her. Meanwhile I'll just enjoy the happiness that meeting lovely people like her brings me.

If you have fed your baby for longer than you expected, or longer than those around you did, you will understand why this little meeting meant as much to me as it did. If you're starting out feeding your first little bundle, the best bit of advise I can give you is to find your village. Surround yourself with moms who are fluent in boob. The ones who let you be the parent you are, with no judgement. The ones who understand, when you have chocolate for breakfast between a leap and a teething. The ones who make you feel like a superwoman.

Happy boobing!

Hi

I haven't written as much as a postcard in months.
Meal plans give me writer's block.
I can barely remember what language I'm meant to use most days.
There, that's the hard part out of the way. The curse of the blank page broken.

I'm a mom to my little lady, Captain Milkbeard. She is sixteen months and doesn't need coffee to have enough energy to power a small village. I need lots of coffee to power a medium-sized mama.
I am a wife to my Hubby. I have been that for two years now.
I am also a stepmom to Buddy, who is eight.
That is my little family, who keep me busy. I love them dearly and try to keep them alive by feeding them plenty. So far it has worked quite well. (We won't talk about the dark times, when I left Hubby alone with Buddy and travelled out of the country without leaving a freezer stash. Those stories are for much later stages and not for the delicate.)

Becoming a mother changed me from a strange creature with a tendency to depression into a strange, incredibly happy - though very tired- hippy. I found my way into attachment parenting accidentally, and was delighted to find it and my village.
I breastfeed, co-sleep, babywear, do baby-led weaning and cloth diaper. I also do elimination communication, but in a very relaxed (read: lazy) way.

I love photography. I used to model, but don't want to curb my cravings for anything that is a) a carb b) covered in chocolate c) ideally both. This means I finally bought a camera and now take pictures of the kids. And food. And kids covered in food. Did I mention my life revolves around kids and food?
I love books, but find it hard to focus in reading lately. It might have something to do with having kids.
I love cooking and baking. Luckily. You will see plenty of evidence of this in weeks to come, I'm sure.
I love supporting other mamas. I have been lucky to have amazing women supporting me, and I'm trying to repay this by training to become a breastfeeding counsellor.

That is a little bit about me, I hope to meet other mamas, share stories and grow my little village even more.